Hadacol

I doubt that any here present
Have heard any Hadacol tales
But for a substantial period beginning in the 1940s and fifties
It generated millions in annual sales

Hadacol was a health tonic
Containing 12 ounces of alcohol according to the label description
Sold extensively in the then dry counties of the South
Freely available, as a purchase required no prescription

One of the unusual ingredients
Was a diluted form of an acid, which by and by
Opened the arteries to allow quick absorption of its alcohol content
Thus creating a rapid alcohol high

The Hadacol Company was owned by a man named Leblanc
Who promoted Hadacol very broadly
Turning the jingle “Hadacol Boogie”
Into a popular recording

He created the Hadacol Caravan, featuring many Hollywood stars
Touring shows that played at places where many thousands could be seated
Utilizing ball parks, race tracks,
Wherever else there were large bleachers

In 1950, Leblanc offered a substantial financial incentive
To any parrot owner if he was trained to say “Polly Wants Hadacol”, a very imaginative promotion
Which apparently did not produce the desired parrot
But certainly caused considerable commotion

In a 15 month period ending in March, 1951
Hadacol exceeded 3 Million in sales
Six months later he sold the Hadacol Company for over 8 million
So Leblanc prospered financially, although the Company later failed

In 1952 in an interview with Groucho Marx
In response to Groucho’s question as to how Hadacol helped improve people’s lives
It was good for five and one half million for me last year
LeBlanc frankly replied

So the moral of this story is that
As long as health tonics containing alcohol can legally be sold, goes this odd mentality
The voters will continue to stagger to the polls
And ban its sale as an expression of public morality