Jack Sprat

                                              

Jack Sprat could eat no fat Joan,
his wife, could eat no lean
Each was stubborn in their way
And couldn’t agree on healthy food in between

The result was a disaster to their health
Joan could qualify as a circus fat lady star
And Jack was rapidly fading away
And soon could slide through prison bars

Being desperate about their condition
They decided to visit a well-known shrink
Hoping a solution would emerge
From what he would think

Many visits did subsequently occur, during which he asked many questions
Seeking the answer to the couple’s odd eating pattern
The frustrated twosome finally requested his analysis of their problem
I non habent sensus, he said in Latin

The disappointed couple raised their eyebrows
And felt a translation was their due
The shrink reluctantly responded
It means I haven’t got a clue

Desperate for better health, Jack and Jill consulted Wikipedia
They sought appropriate Gods in their desperate mood
The one that appeared to be most useful
Was Annapoora devi, The Hindu goddess of food

So they sent many prayers to Annapoora
Hoping to reach her in the heavenly sky

But she never answered them
Too busy dining in royal fashion to send them a reply

So perhaps the telling of this tale
Leads to this conclusion

Sometimes neither shrink or Goddess can help you
Only you can find a solution

Jack and Jill Updated

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch water needed for life

Jack fell down and broke his crown

Said Jill-If you expect a woman to  follow, you'd better get another wife

After needed repairs, Jack sped to their home

Expecting to resume their existing relationship

No, No said Jill, who then sued for divorce

Alleging she was subject to gross endangerment

First published some 140 years ago

This nursery rhyme reflected standards then common to our nation

Hardly relevant today

In the time of womens' liberation